This week Time Magazine published an article that questions "whether dads -- at least as a group -- have done a good enough job to deserve the honor" of Father's Day.
The article cites statistics that suggest that the answer may be an unequivocal no.
For example, it states, "In the U.S., more than half of divorced fathers lose contact with their kids within a few years."
It further states, "According to a 1994 study by the Children's Defense Fund, men are more likely to default on a child-support payment (49%) than a used-car payment (3%)."
Finally, the article notes, "Even fathers in intact families spend a lot less time focused on their kids than they think: in the U.S. fathers average less than an hour a day (up from 20 minutes a few decades ago), usually squeezed in after the workday."
Glenn Sacks, a men's and fathers' issues columnist, calls the article a "hatchet job" and attempts to debunk its disheartening statistics in his latest blog.
"The drumbeat continues," laments a passionate and perturbed Sacks, "dads don't care, dads walk out, dads are stingy. All of these canards have been debunked many times, but that doesn't stop the mainstream media's attacks on fathers and fatherhood."
In fact, according to a press release from the University of Maryland, "Fathers have never mattered as much as they do this Father's Day."
UM Assistant Professor of Education Natasha J. Cabrera, who has spent the last five years studying fathers, believes, "Fathers today are more involved in the daily routine of children's lives than they were 20 or 30 years ago."
She attributes this to "increased maternal labor force participation" and adds that "changing family structures -- more single-parent, combined, cohabiting, and divorced families -- has helped create a cultural shift that expects more hands-on child rearing from dads."
More dads are getting more involved in their children's lives. But even when fathers become less involved, it is usually not completely by choice.
"Research is also unequivocal that few fathers abandon their children voluntarily," says Stephen Baskerville, president of the American Coalition for Fathers of Children. "Most fatherless children result from fathers being forcibly separated from their children by courts."
Regardless of what research indicates, there are still far too many fathers who spend far too little time with their children. And while there are many explanations for this, hardly any of these explanations amount to real excuses.
Still, there are enough fathers doing enough to deserve the honor of Father's Day because it only takes one.
Even if only one father is a positive presence in his child's life, his loved ones and friends should pause every now and again to encourage him; for like mom, the difference dad makes in the life of a child can determine the difference he will make in the life of a whole community.
But Father's Day should not be only for those who are good fathers, but also for those who are growing fathers.
Let us observe Father's Day, not just because there are countless (or uncounted!) loving fathers who are intimately involved in the lives of their children, but also because there are a lot of fathers who need to be loved to wholeness.
iAMrj * richard jones
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8 comments:
I'm a very loving father of two beautiful young daughters. I'm also divorced. It is the court system that sucks badly, not fathers. Time Magazine was irresponsible in allowing this half-hazzard article to be published.
"Regardless of what research indicates, there are still far too many fathers who spend far too little time with their children. And while there are many explanations for this, hardly any of these explanations amount to real excuses."
What?!
What exactly is this opinion based on, if not research?
Who are you to say that you can ignore facts and decide that a lot of fathers don't meet your expectations?!
I see this article as a conformation that Father's Day is even more important than ever. If the "statistics" are correct, then if gives us more reason to celebrate those men who DO take care of their families. Time magazine had nothing else to write about...negativity and drama sells, so that's the direction they went.
I`ve allways been the #1 in being there for my daughter and because of all the benifits the gov. gives to the mothers along with just handing out restraining orders based on about nothing I now have missed our Father daughter dance and now going to miss my little partners 10th birthday,I`ve shed a million tears and her mother has still to shed just one.I`m so glad our gov.looks out so well for our children.Shinks,drugs,mothers,O-K?
Since they gave power to the mothers who want to look at there kids as there little babies and not disapline but help protect them when in trouble so they won`t look like the bad guy,we now in the last few generations have seen what a wonderful job they have been doing,I don`t recall kids killing kids when the fathers had the rights,I guess when lawyers make laws it to benifit them.I guess the mothers didn`t want to pay for there childs well being as much as fathers will.
I've got news for all you left wing liberal lunatic kook fringers who either work for, or take stock in, what time magazine writes! (I don't capatilize on purpose) Were it not for you're Fathers' sperm donation, you would not exist to write, and or read such Femanazzi BS
People can do a better job of caring for eachother generally in our community.
The article focuses on what a partriarchal model of Fathering is about in a community fuelled by consummerism and greed..
many many men are Fathers and great men to children who are their own and those that are not. Male/Fathering/parenting behaviour is to be celebrated and always improved upon; as all behaviour is..
We must nurture Fathering/parenting as a community not a commodity.
Disappointment, does not equate to being value-less.
Arabella
Way to shit up an article on the supposed importance of fathers in todays society. Let alone do it on father's day. To top it all off its written by two women who know nothing about being a father. Ten bucks says they are either both divorced or lesbians or both.
Have a good day.
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